a word that I can't understand

He says, "don't you think I'm boring?"

Boring?
No.
I want to tell him, "You are beautiful: too beautiful. The shape of your eyes makes my heart ache. I watch your profile when we are together and I know that you aren't looking. Every time you touch me, it's a surprise. A sweet, pleasant surprise that makes my stomach flip. Being around you and listening to your ideas makes me feel a little more alive than before. You re-awaking a part of me that I thought had died when ex-otter left me. You are young, though older than me. You are responsible, but happy. You are upbeat. You are too innocent to be interested in me; yet you say you are. I think that I could trust you, but first I have to win you. You are an enigma. I cannot read you. I can't tell what you're feeling. You are one of the few people that I've felt that way about. But boring? No. You are not boring. That is a word that would not enter into my vocabulary when I am with you."

He kisses like he doesn't know how. Closed mouth, no tongue. His hands are gentle as he strokes my leg. I make every move first. Every move. I find this disarming.
He says, "maybe we could be good for each other. I could become more assertive, and you could become more self-confident." I don't know if this is true, but I like that he wants it to be. I hope this continues.

Logistically, I'm not sure we could date. I don't even know if he'd want to. So many women think he's beautiful. I am just some weirdo with strange fashion sense and bizarre hair. Part of his appeal is his distance. Why must I be attracted to emotionally unavailable men? Is it a defense mechanism, born from my ex-otter broken heart?

I don't even know if I'm really feeling all of this or if I just want to. All I know is that I think about him a lot. The idea of corrupting him is very appealing. At the same time, I think it might be a shame for him to lose such endearing innocence.
He called me charming.
Am I charming?

Shy men are my forte.